lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
