so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Randomize