you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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