can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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