Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize