Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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