I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
