i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
