The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
My pussy is not your playground.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
