Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
