i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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