If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
