Soap is not a condiment
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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