dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
