All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
