Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Randomize
