TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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