he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
