the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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