Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
the day after is always just damage control
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
