You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
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