Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I have aggressive nipples.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
