Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I just spread your mom's ashes with my new girlfriend. I wouldve waited for you to fly home but she was uncomfortable in the house with her remains there. I'll mail you the urn since u handpainted it.
YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND ALREADY!?! WTF WE JUST HAD HER FUNERAL 3 WEEKS AGO!!!!!!!!!!!!
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Randomize
