Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
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