She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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