too bad you live with your parents still
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize