apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Randomize
