she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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