We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize
