I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
