You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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