You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
