yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Randomize
