This dress was meant to end up on your floor
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
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