Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
