i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
