oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
