Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
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