Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize