That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
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