ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Floor bacon is actually really good
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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