I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Randomize
