If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
