It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Randomize
