he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Randomize