talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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