I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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