dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize