Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
What happened to fro yo and sex?
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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