And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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