i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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