Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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