We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
